"Food is really important isn't it?"
Jack, 4 and a half
"Can I have one of those ice cream rectangle things with chocolate on?"
"When we crunch our food it means lovely doesn't it!"
Jack 4 and a half
"I wonder why they're called Hula Hoops? P'raps because they're hula, and they're shaped like hoops."
Me: "Do you want some of these?"
Jack: "No thankyou. They make my lips go sore. "
Aged 5 and a half
"Why do you put milk in breakfast?"
"All we ever have for breakfast is a load of crap."
Elliott 9 and a half
"I like the flat eggs"
Jack, 7 and a half
"I'll eat a sausage, but I'll NEVER try Daddies Sauce!"
"I made you a cup of tea. It's coffee."
"I love the round ones. You get more in them"
Elsie on Dry Roasted Peanuts, 9
"Would you eat three worms for a tenner?"
Jack, 8 and a half to Elliott
"Dad. When you make my sandwiches can you make square ones cos they're quicker to eat."
Elsie, 5 and a half
"When you put a lolly on the side of your mouth, and you hold it there, when you put your tongue there it's all bobbly isnt it?"
Jack 6 and three quarters
"I don't want a sandwich cos it's making me feel like I want a doughnut."
"Spuds guide me on my way."
"I can crack apples!"
"I've mixed mine into mouldy cow plop."
"Where do olives come from? Pizzas?"
"This cheese has gone off"
"That's what rats guts look like... all brown and white like toffee"
Elliott eating mashed potato, 6
"Oops I forgot to take the wrapper of that one."
"Can you die of food poisoning if you eat raw rice?"
Jack, 12 Playing Jack Ass with Elliott
"I want to eat his beard."
Elsie eyes up the father christmas icing age 2
"Pears are juicy, really yummy, They've got a lot of juice in... in every side."
"What are your favourite vegetables?"
"Without salt or tomato ketchup, it tastes like cardboard." (Sausage hoops and chips)